Brene Brown studies women, and only women, Jeremy Mohler
Her work with men amounts to advising them on how to be more like women.
By her own admission, Brown had no interest in men until she gave birth to her son and realized (to her surprise) that she was eventually going to be the parent of a man.
Nonetheless, the descriptions of vulnerability that you attribute to Brown sound right to me.
The article will be more helpful when you make clear what problem “vulnerability” solves for men. For example, you regret the time and energy you spent trying to please other people. You don’t make clear how vulnerability helps you redirect your energies towards an agenda that works better for you.
I agree with you that “just be yourself is misleading advice.”
Eventually, I came to realize that my efforts to lead a more authentic life were not advanced by being “me,” but by striving to be more like the person whom I wished to become.
The vulnerability in that was that it takes courage to show the world who you want to be. It’s easy to defend yourself against criticism of who you are, because we can all blame circumstances that were beyond our control.
Once we show the world who we wish we were, it’s like granting the world a license to attack our ego, because our aspirations are a function only of our choices (and as such, subject to ridicule by others).
That’s the real vulnerability.
