There was a time in my marriage when my misconceptions were making me and my wife miserable Dovid Feldman
I didn’t understand intersexual dynamics, and as a consequence I acted with expectations that were out of whack with reality. I was behaving in accordance with a broken (in the sense that it wasn’t working) mental model.
Athol Kay’s Married Man Sex Life was my introduction to an improved mental model, based on Red Pill praxeology. Kay’s writing applied his understanding of Red Pill and PUA to build attraction within marriage.
I also read Glover’s No More Mr Nice Guy, which opened up my eyes to the behaviors that so infuriated my wife and undermined our marriage.
The improved understanding that I gained resulted in enormous improvements in our physical health (reduction of body fat, reduction of high blood pressure, management of addiction) and mental health.
Nonetheless, one of our revelations was that my wife and I had different ideas about what we wanted our lives to be like after our youngest child graduated from High School. These differences meant that we could no longer be committed to one another without one of us setting aside our ideals about who we wanted to become.
Our marriage ended after one particularly emotional couples counseling session, in which it’s fair to say I “opened up.”
That session left our marriage in shredded tatters. We were on a trajectory for towards separation and divorce before we reached the parking lot.
That’s not a bad thing.
It’s given us both the freedom to redesign our lives in accordance with a vision of the people we want to become.
